If you send a text message to the top five people in your contacts list asking them how
they are doing, I guarantee at least four will reply using the word ‘busy’. It’s highly unlikely that anyone will reply complaining of boredom. I’m
a member of The Busy Club myself. But I’ve decided I want to rescind my membership.
My body has not been happy with me recently. Mostly we have a
good relationship but occasionally we veer into irritable sibling territory.
The source of contention: divergent interests. My mind wants me to leap
ahead with #allthegoals now now now but my body is demanding rest. It does so
through what I’ve come to recognise as its fuse-breakers: skin breakouts,
a cold sore (gross) and waning energy levels. These are red flags for me
to stop and rest; if I ignore them, my life comes to a grinding halt
and may refuse to restart for quite some time. You would think, then,
that it would be a good idea for me to give my body what it needs.
Except.
I’m just not very good at doing nothing. I will sometimes allow myself
an afternoon nap at weekends, but I’ve got so much on my plate right now, that
doing something “unproductive” such as colouring- in or watching a DVD feels
like time wasted (nope, I’m not a Capricorn – I’m actually a Scorpio).
Relaxation, I tell my body, is something best done when I’ve done all
the other stuff I need to get done. Which is about as likely to happen as Taylor
Swift’s next album containing zero references to Calvin Harris. When you’re
juggling multiple freelance projects, a blog, social media channels, not
to mention a gym program, friendships and a relationship, there is never
nothing to be done. Few people, I suspect, would regard that as a problem... and THAT is the problem.
We’ve started to glorify busyness as if it were the default setting
instead of just a semi-regular, short-term event. If you’re not crazy-busy and
stressed out, there’s something wrong with you. Wait, what?
We’re all about the ‘hustle’ and the ‘slay’. It feels
like every second social media post is affirming that the only way to
succeed is to kickarse tirelessly, striving ahead with
everythingeverything alldayeveryday. I saw a post this morning that
declared “now is the new later”. Instead of motivating me, it only made me feel
really, really tired.
That’s the thing. All this running around doing everything at once
and being everything at once – while looking at our phones – is
exhausting. Plus, it’s counter-productive. We can’t excel at anything if
we’re trying to do everything. Even the ocean is still sometimes.
We seem to have forgotten that we’re human BEINGS not human DOINGS. It’s
not hustling that helps us learn and grow – that is what happens in
self-reflection.
I’d like to propose a radical alternative to all this busyness: hopping
out of the driver’s seat regularly, and checking into a rest stop.
Taking time out to relax has the practical benefit of not only allowing
the body to recharge, in preparation for your next adventures, but also
allows you to take your emotional temperature. Just like a pilot checking
in with air traffic control to make sure they’re still on track for their
destination, self-reflection helps you think about where you’re heading,
as well as the challenges you’re wrestling with and your overall life-satisfaction
levels.
It also creates space for the Universe to step in and help you. Arianna
Huffington wrote: “Life is a dance between making it happen, and letting
it happen.” Dreams and goals are not meant to be a constant struggle.
Mostly, they’re a partnership with the Universe – 50 per
cent listening and 50 per cent action. If you’re hustling hustling hustling but making no
progress, maybe you’re holding on too tightly to how you think things should be;
the Universe may have a better idea for you, if you stop and give it room to make that
happen.
I stumbled upon a great quote recently (because let’s not forget that
social media can be really helpful!) that has reinforced my suspicion that I need to make
a point of stopping regularly instead of constantly surging forward. It’s about
bringing back a greater sense of balance, for the sake of my body and my soul. The
quote was: “Grace will take you places hustlin’ can’t.”
I love this. Grace is what happens when you stop to find
stillness amid the haste – and instead of feeling guilty, you feel fulfilled.
Grace is when you listen to your body and give it what it needs – not kombucha
or trendy foods, but simple, good-quality nutrition, exercise and sleep. Grace is being present
in this moment instead of focusing on what’s coming up. Grace is about stepping
out of struggle and surrendering to the Universe, instead
of trying to control everything. Grace is checking out of The Busy Club.
Grace is what I’m doing right now. Curled up on the couch on a Sunday
afternoon in my pyjamas with a blanket, watching Pride and Prejudice.
Aaaaaand writing this post while simultaneously replying to Instagram comments,
admittedly. Hey, I’m a slow learner.
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