I see negative people, they're everywhere... (this is how I shield myself)

Lately the angel cards have repeatedly urged us to clear away toxic energies, so a blog post on shielding against negativity seemed like a good idea.

Having worked in the magazine industry for almost 15 years, I’ve crossed paths with some fairly extreme personalities. Narcissism, cynicism, backstabbing and just plain nastiness are par for the course in what is a highly competitive field - although, this can happen in any workplace. Because I’m very sensitive to other people’s energy (read my post about that here), it’s been essential to learn to avoid absorbing those harsh energies. If I don’t protect myself from negativity emanating from the Eeyores or the Regina Georges of this world, I feel sluggish, miserable and on edge.

In the past year I’ve become better at shielding myself against negative energies. It’s not possible to live in a place where you never encounter whingers or mean-spirited types, but you can certainly limit the extent that you're affected by them. I do a shielding exercise every morning as part of my daily meditation. I also often carry crystals, such as clear quartz and labrodite to prevent me absorbing other people’s energies – particularly when I’m doing reiki sessions, during which I’m working intensely in people’s energy fields – but you don't have to go to those lengths.

This is how my shielding exercise works. While meditating (you don't have to meditate to do this, you can just visualise it), I’ll call upon Archangel Michael, the archangel in charge of protection, to create a shield around me. He's the patron saint of police officers and security guards, so I regard him as my spiritual bouncer. I’ll envisage him using his sword to create a bubble of white light around me for protection. Next, I’ll ask for extra layers. If I’m feeling like my self-love or compassion are lacking, I’ll ask for a layer of sparkly pink light to boost my love energy. If I’m feeling emotional, I might ask for green energy, which opens my heart chakra and invokes healing. Then I’ll ask for a layer of purple light, which is psychic protection, or energy field protection. Basically, this protects me from lower energies, negativity and harsh energies. If this is too complicated or just too 'out there' for you, just focus on the white light layer – that’s for general protection. I ask for this to remain intact for 24 hours.

Does this mean I’ll never encounter criticism or nastiness? No. Haters gonna hate, as that wise philosopher Taylor Swift once declared (lol). But it does mean I don’t feel myself being sucked into that vortex. I’m not taking on what I’m being exposed to. It’s easier to simply shake it off (sorry, couldn’t resist that one).

Most emotions will hit you with no rhyme or reason, and there’s little you can do about that. But when those emotions belong to other people, you don’t have to take them on. Shielding yourself is a way to take control.

*If you feel like you’re weighed down with other people’s energies, a reiki session can help. I also offer distance energy healing and cord cutting; email onegroundedangel@gmail.com for more information.

One for the sensitive types. How your weakness can be your strength

Confession: I hate parties. I’m awkward when it comes to small talk because I’m rubbish at ‘playing the game’, and I find meeting new people terrifying. Christmas parties are a battle of endurance for me, and summer barbecues with people I don’t know are acutely uncomfortable. For a long time I labelled this as shyness however I’ve realised that, yes, I am slow to relax in other people’s company and don’t enjoy talking about myself, but I actually don’t fit into the category of ‘shy’. I also attributed this mild social anxiety to being an introvert – which is true, I am – but this doesn’t completely explain my level of discomfort in social settings. 

A month ago I read an article in Elephant Journal that made all the pieces fall into place. My preference for short, one-on-one interactions – or none at all – is nothing to do with shyness or introversion, it’s all about being highly sensitive. It’s about the way I respond to social exchanges on an emotional level.

This is what it means to be highly sensitive:

* You need massive amounts of time alone

* You pick up on other people’s moods instantly, and usually absorb them

* You feel overwhelmed by social situations and crowds

* You feel emotions deeply

* You appreciate and respond to art, music and beauty at a very deep level

That’s a tick, tick, tick, tick and a half-tick for me.

The fact that I’m highly sensitive means I can’t work for long periods in offices that are super bitchy or super negative because that drags down my mood and drains my energy. I can’t have a packed social calendar, because I need lots of time in solitude to recharge. I can’t watch news footage of tragedies or disasters because I am seized by intense despair. I can’t enjoy boxing or sports where violence is encouraged because I find the aggression really confronting. 

In a society that prizes physical dominance and discourages displays of emotion, sensitivity is regarded as a weakness. I vividly recall being told: "Don’t be so sensitive," as an adolescent when I complained about being bullied. (Um, thanks, really helpful. Nothing like a spot of victim shaming to avoid tackling an issue.)

What I understand now is that being sensitive is not a weakness, it’s a strength. It’s what helps me to perceive, via my intuition, when people need help, extra kindness or just space. It’s also the thing that allows me to tune into other people’s energy fields to help them identify emotional blocks – hence my affinity with reiki and angel card readings. (It also means I can be prone to taking those energies on board, but I have measures to avoid that.)

Highly sensitive types are the ones who create dazzling works of art, poetry and performance that allow us to see the world in entirely new ways. They are terrible at dating but excellent at long-term relationships. They have a small group of friends who they forge strong connections with. They listen far more than they speak. They are very protective of their personal space and don't react well to being touched by strangers or people they don’t know well. 

For me, being sensitive means I need plenty of self-care. It’s about lots of sleep, lots of water, lots of exercise, and lots of time on my own. It’s also vital to make time to be creative and to be still. It feels good to be at an age where I don’t have to make an excuse for choosing, and enjoying, these activities. I know I feel better for them. I also do a shielding ritual as part of my daily morning meditation, to protect myself, my physical space and my energetic space. This means I can face the day knowing that no matter who I’m around, I’m not going to get dragged down by their mood or their ‘stuff'’. (Happy to give tips on this to anyone who’d like to know more about how to do this, just drop me an email.)

If this post resonates with you, I hope you can find ways to embrace and nurture your sensitivity too.